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[16 Jun 2008|01:06pm]
 i am looking foreward to wednesday.

he is adorable. :)

im done writing in here. 

this is my last entry. 

goodbye all.
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[02 Jun 2008|08:21pm]
 eh i dunno whats up
hes busy
me too
he called me back though
i overreacted

like always
calm down Hannah 

were going to dinner.
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[29 May 2008|09:29pm]
i miss  nick.
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[20 Apr 2008|05:33pm]
oh and fucking obviously that guy that asked me out has tourettes

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[17 Apr 2008|08:12pm]
like i said expect the unexpected

im so pumped for earth week and sleeping at craigs and riding my bike to school with everyone and dressing up. hahah im so lame. 

i hung out with jaci today after school i had a good time
today she wore nicks shirt some black shirt that i remember looking really good on him
it smelled like him and it made me really miss him 
i hate him 

im so excited to wear my new dress tommorrow. i love dresses i think i am just going to wear them al lthe time. like everyday. 

derek is supposed to call me tonight to talk. im really kind of nervous. i have no clue what he is going to say. 

my whole life right now is pretty up in the air! 
sometimes i hate planning ahead

im glad nicks not going to umiami
even though i should stop thinking about him
but i CAN"T 


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[03 Apr 2008|06:39pm]
didn 't get in to emerson
but i got into sarah lawrence and they are giving me money 
i love jaci most passionatly she is the best ever and she makes me laugh 
kira and mike are silly and i deeply enjoy talking to both of them 
i can't wait to go see zombie boy with kd
i hope to hang out with danielle
i am excited to see sophia. 

i am very happy at this interval in my life.
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[31 Mar 2008|12:33pm]
 i am sorry i am like this
sorry i can't get control
sorry i am fucking things up for everyone else
espechally my parents
they don't deserve to have to deal with this
i feel awful 
about everything...
im so sorry
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[29 Mar 2008|05:09pm]
finally went to school
it was long
the sad part is that i am not that behind. 
i went to see godspell on friday 
it was good 
i liked it, i thought the singing was very good
and mike jones is so funny i almost pissed myself

i worked today from 8-4 
it sucked
i do the same tommorrow too
oh well 
good money mutha fucka

im in a bad mood
maybe cause im tired.
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[24 Mar 2008|11:44am]
yesterday i did something stupid
not that it mattered anyways because my parents found me
and they called the cops to make sure i would go anywhere until they got there
which i didn't
my parents don't know anything 
they just think i am crazy
which i am

this is just me giving in
me being weak
its too hard to be strong
its too hard to go to school

i miss jaci the most
i miss the way she smells
i know thats creepy
but it is comforting
scents always comfort me
everyday i think about that time that she came and brought me books and layed next to me 
and read a magazine with me
it was the most wonderful thing she could have ever done.
but she doesn't talk to me any more
i don't really know why
i don't know what i did
i know i am crazy 
it is easier to try and accept things for the way they are then to pretend.

im sorry.
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[23 Mar 2008|06:29pm]
 what  did i do wrong?

im not doing well.
im sorry. 
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[15 Mar 2008|05:50pm]
it was too much at once
now i have spiraled backwards
it is like drowning 
only inside of my mind
i try and try to resurface 
but i keep sinking under
this struggle on its own is terribly depressing

i don't know what to do.

i miss my friends.
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[09 Mar 2008|05:05pm]
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[09 Mar 2008|04:28pm]
I am done wasting my time. 
i don't need this shit.
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[08 Mar 2008|04:03pm]
seriously what the fuck 
this is just mean 
it is cruel
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[07 Mar 2008|02:37pm]
 i hate this 
if i don't make plans with my friends 
then i stay home
because they don't inculde me
if i don't ask them what is happening in their lives
they don't tell
why do i have to do all the work
i am tired of feeling pain 
i am tired of being unhappy
i know i need to help myself as well 
but whats the point of me putting in so much effort all the time when i just keep getting let down 
when i just keep sitting at home. 

why is this happening. 
what did i do 
what did i do. 

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[06 Mar 2008|06:12pm]
I don 't know what to do anymore
i am tired of fighting
i am tired of all of this
i don't have energy to put in my all 
won't someone see this
i need help support friendship love
it is not so hard 
to stretch out ones hand
aren't we all tired
can't we all hold each others hands
why should i push when there is no pull 
i cannot try if noone else tries
can't you see 
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[02 Mar 2008|03:54pm]
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[01 Mar 2008|11:26pm]
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[01 Mar 2008|05:31pm]
accepted to 3 colleges 
offered money by one
3 more to go. 
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[29 Feb 2008|09:15am]
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